How to Love Sunsets?
by wannabbeautiful
Summary: What if Ponyboy got the letter from Johnny immediately after he died. What if he Ponyboy set out to save Dally right after he ran out? What if Dally doesn't die along with Johnny? Ponyboy wants to fulfill Johnny's last wishes. He wants to teach Dally how to love and dig sunsets. Is it possible or will Dally be cold and hard as ever?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The nurse came in. I tried to hold my sobs in as Johnny wouldn't move. Dally had left seconds ago or was it minutes? It could've been years for all I knew. All I knew was Johnny was dead. It seemed to me it couldn't be possible, that Johnny would move any second now and I would scold him for the sick joke he pulled on Dally and me.

However, this joke was too cruel to be real.

It was gone. I was gone. The hope that everything would turn out okay in the end was gone. Nothing would ever be okay again. The nurse kneeled down next to me with an understanding look on her face. She didn't understand. No one would ever understand. I didn't even comprehend what I was feeling. How could anyone else?

"He wanted me to give this to you." she spoke softly. I looked at Johnny, lying on the bed, still there, untouched. It has been minutes after his death and, yet, it looked like just mere seconds.

I looked at the nurse. Her features were as soft as her voice. Her blonde hair was wrapped in a bun. Her eyes were dark, as dark as Johnny's. I looked at the book in her hand. _Gone With the Wild._ I took the book from her wordlessly and she gave a slight nod and walked away. I needed to be alone and the nurse knew it. I skimmed through the book, remembering what Johnny and I had read and what we enjoyed, our last fond memories together. i nearly burst in tears as I remember what could never happen anymore but I stayed strong, like Darry stayed strong at Mom and Dad's funeral.

_We ain't gonna cry no more, are we?_

"_Nope. We're all cried out now."_

I tried harder not to. As I flipped through the pages, a note slipped out of it. Curiosity hid my pain for a split second. I picked up the note and realized it was a letter. I read it, almost eagerly.

Ponyboy, I asked the nurse to give you this book so you could finish it. The doctor came in a while ago but I knew anyway. I keep getting tireder and tireder. Listen, I don't mind dying now. It was worth it. It's worth saving those kids. Their lives are worth more than mine, they have more to live for. Some of their parents came by to thank me and I know it was worth it. Tell Dally it was worth it. I'm just gonna miss you guys. I've been thinking about it, and that poem, that guy that wrote it, he meant you're gold when you're a kid, like green. When you're a kid everything's new, dawn. It's just when you get used to everything that it's day. Like the way you dig sunsets, Pony. That's gold. Keep that way, it's a good way to be. I want you to tell Dally to look at one. He'll probably think you're crazy, but ask for me. I don't think he's ever really seen a sunset. And don't be so bugged over being a greaser. You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want. There's still lots of good in the world. Tell Dally. I don't think he knows. Your buddy, Johnny.

I came into slow realization in what I had to. I had to fulfill Johnny's last wish. I had to tell Dally, but first, I had to save him. I knew he was gonna do something he regretted. He was in pain and that was the only way he dealt with it. he got in trouble. I had a feeling he was gonna get in bigger trouble than he usually did and that was nearly impossible for him.

I ran out the hospital as fast as I could with the letter in my hand, determined to save Dally, determined to break his hard, cold shell.

_**A/N Hey guys, sorry for the short chapter. It's kinda like a preface. I wanna update like every two days. Maybe less or more. I hope you guys liked it. im working on Chapter 2. Review what you would like to see in the story. And review just for fun! **_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I was afraid. I was afraid that I wouldn't find Dally. I was afraid that I would let Johnny down and if I did that, I'd let myself down.

I knew he was probably gonna rob a store, beat up someone, or something. He couldn't have gone far. I looked outside the hospital. My mind slowly started to numb. I almost welcomed it but realized that numbness would drive me away from my purpose. I thought of all the times Dally had helped us. He may have only helped us cause of Johnny, but still. I felt I owed him too.

There was a liquor store on my left, about three blocks far. I started towards there because that was probably where he was going. I let my feet take over, trying not to feel. My whole body throbbed because of the rumble that was not too long ago. It felt like months ago. I sped past the stores, everything going in blurs. I couldn't tell if it was because I was running too fast or tears were filling my eyes. When I was almost there, something hit me and knocked me to the floor as I ran pass the grocery store. I felt as if the whole left side of my body was bruised. I looked to see what had hit me and nearly caused me to get a concussion. My head already hurt because that Soc beat it in. It was Dally. He looked at me for a second, narrowing his eyes. For the first time in my whole life, I saw pain, real pain, clear in Dallas Winston's eyes. He got up and kept running. My eyes widened as I saw what was in his hands: money. He had just robbed the store.

A sturdy man came out confirming my horrors. "Police! Police! Someone catch that kid!"

I heard sirens go off. I started to feel dizzy. It took me a minute to get up and start chasing Dally again. This time I wasn't the only one. I tried to speed up. Dally was heading towards the lot. It was pitch black. It would be pretty hard to find him in there.

"Dally!" I yelled. I almost reached him. Although I felt sick and tired, I was still fast enough to almost catch up to him. As I entered the lot, I looked around. The sirens sounded pretty close now. Everything was going too fast for me to handle. "Dally!" My voice sounded a bit weaker.

"Dally, please come out." I cried I knew he wouldn't, though. I heard ruffling to my left. I really couldn't see what was going on in the empty lot. I went towards the noise. It was coming from behind a tree. I heard sobbing. Never in my life, and I mean never, had I thought I would see the day that Dallas Winston would shed a tear. I didn't know how to approach this but I knew I didn't have time.

"Dally?" I said softly.

A gun popped out from behind the tree, a gun and a hand. I was terrified.

"You better get away, kid, or this thing's going off." Dallas said his voice husky.

I was about to ask if he'd really shoot me, but I thought of a better question.

"Would Johnny really want you to kill me? If you think so, go ahead pull the trigger."

My heart pounded quickly, scared out of mind. I quickly apologized to all the people that I've done wrong to. _Oh, please, God. Let me live._ I knew he could do it. he was in a very fragile state. I wondered if I should take back my last statement or just let him do it.

He got up, the gun and his hand, sliding out of view. Then, he got out from behind the tree. He held the gun with both hands. The gun was pointed at my forehead. He cocked the gun. I closed my eyes. If I died, I would die with dignity, especially because I let him do it. I heard him slowly pull the trigger. _Soda, Darry, please forgive me._

The gun was empty. I remembered when he said the gun was just a trick to get Socs away. When he pulled it, he started crying, and I mean bawling. I didn't know what to do. I felt really bad, but I dint know what to do. I walked closer to him. "It's alright, Dally." I tried to calm him down. The sirens were here. I tried to hold him the way Soda did when Johnny-I nearly choked. "It's gonna be alright, Dally." I wasn't sure myself. It didn't feel like things were ever gonna be okay again.

I heard people running towards us. I took the money Dally dropped. The cops were here. It was about five or six guys with flashlights. Wow, that was a lot for one guy, but it was Dally. I slowly loosened my grip on Dally and went to the cops. Dally was still crying. It would support my story.

I didn't know how to approach this. I went towards the nicest looking cop. The cops looked almost as confused as I felt. They saw the toughest guy anyone would ever see crying. I'm not really sure what I looked like that night after all that went on but I must've looked awful. I was out of breath and I was pretty sure I was bleeding everywhere.

I nudged towards Dallas. "His little brother just died." I wasn't lying. As I spoke the words, I knew it was the truth. Dally cared for Johnny like Darry cares for me. "Could you please cut him some slack?" I asked as nicely as I could.

The police officers looked at him. They've seen him at the station before. He stole, he cheated, and he lied, and did just about every illegal thing in the book but never for a good reason. This was the only thing he did out of sorrow, not anger.

I put the money in one of the man's hands. "Here, can you give this back to the store?" I started walking back towards Dallas but I turned around to say one more thing. "Oh, and the gun, Dally probably threatened the store owner with, it's empty." I threw it to them.

They didn't say anything but I knew I had them on my side. I silently went back.

Dally looked at me. He stopped crying for a few seconds. I could have imagined what he would have gone and said if he wasn't like this. He would have nodded approvingly. He would have told me that I knew how to sweet talk my way out of problems with the fuzz and the next time, he'd commit a crime, he'd bring me along. We'd laugh. I tried to remember what my laugh sounded like. It wasn't more than a few hours ago I was budding off with the gang before the rumble.

I looked at Dally in front of me, crying. I heard voices behind me. I saw the world spinning. It was spinning faster and faster. The voices were getting louder and louder. Was that the sound of my guilt, my angst? Was this really happening? I almost smiled to myself. It was all a dream.

I welcomed unconsciousness as I knew I would wake up to a good time, a time where Mom and Dad were alive. Every day after their death felt like a dream. I hit the floor with a thud.

_**A/N Hey, I thought this was a good place to leave off. I'll try to make the next chapters longer if you want me to. I hoped you found as much emotions in reading this chapter as I did writing it. Love you all. Review please.**_


	3. Chapter 3 Part 1

Chapter 3

_**Hey guys. Sorry for the long wait. I wasn't sure if I should continue the story or not. I made a short chapter just to let you guys know I was still writing. I kept writing. I did it for Johnny! (The more reviews I get, the faster and the more I'll write)**_

I was oddly warm when I awoke. I wasn't sure where I could've been. For the last few weeks, I was never sure where I could awake. Today, it was in my own bed astonishingly. However, I was not awake yet. It might have been because I was still drowsy or I just did or want to face reality.

I opened my eyes. I looked around my room. It was the same. I didn't know why I expected it to change. Life was changing so fast that I expected everything was going to change. I leaned my head back and smiled. At least one thing went according to my will.

I got out of the hospital a few days later. I had a concussion. It was partially because of that Soc and partially because of Dally slamming into me. I wasn't really thinking straight those days. I think I was having delusions or something. I couldn't help but think if I was staying in Johnny's old room…

I had devised a plan. I knew how I was going to help Dally, without getting killing of course. I knew he has been avoiding me. I haven't seen him since that night. He didn't visit me in the hospital. I didn't mind really but I was worried about him. I asked Darry and Soda about him. They said he wasn't doing too good. I didn't dare tell them about that night. I didn't know why but I just didn't. I didn't know if I should have. I assumed the truth would come out sooner or later but it didn't have to be right there and then, while I was in the hospital bed.

Anyways, I was walking to the corner store. I asked around and knew Dally's routine for the last few days. He was heading down there to get cigarettes and something strong to drink. It was early in the evening.

Darry was worried about me getting jumped on my way there. However, truthfully I didn't care. I knew how to protect myself. Plus, I was catching up with Dally. No one would try to jump Dally, not now. I knew the story was going around about him robbing that store. It was almost like I was numb, almost as numb as Dally.

I saw him walk out of the store with a couple of packs of heavy duty cigs stashed in his back pocket and a bottle of whiskey in his hand. He had a cold, hard expression on his face.

"Hey Dally!" I called after him. He didn't even turn when I said his name. He only made a small movement to signal he knew I was there. "Whatchya up to?"

"Smoke, drink, party." he said coolly, barely paying attention to me.

I nodded. "Can I come?"

He continued walking at a brisk pace. "Sure, but if Darry comes after me, I'm coming after you." He said indifferently.

"Okay," I said slowly. I had to this, even if might get me in trouble. For in order to save Dallas Winston, you had to understand him. In order to understand him, you have to do what he does, even if that means drinking and partying. I mean it couldn't hurt if it's only for a night, could it?


	4. Chapter 3 Part 2

_**Thanks for the reviews guys. Comments, concern, anything? Just review.**_

I was actually very worried and fearful. I realized what I was doing as soon as the words slipped out of my mouth. I hoped, just a little, that I didn't speak but I had. I didn't go through all this trouble just to give up. Half my brain was thinking that. The other half was screaming at me to run while I could. I could still run. I knew I could. I didn't. That is what made me shocked.

I walked silently besides Dally, afraid to speak. I focused on my surroundings, trying to relieve myself from my thoughts. The sun was fairly close to the horizon, an hour or so before the sun would set. I hoped we would still be walking by that time. I wanted to catch a mere glimpse at it, at least. At most, I wanted to stare at it until it set. Although, nothing would ever be as beautiful as the sunset in the country. I silently vowed to go back there. I could bring Sodapop and maybe, just maybe, Dally would also come.

I nearly tripped over a crack in the sidewalk but Dally caught me before I hit the floor, grabbing my shirt. His dark eyes looked mine straight. It was like black hole you could not get out of. I almost marveled it. "If you break your head before we get there, I swear I'll just leave you here and won't look back, savvy?"

I nodded, abashed. Was Dallas really that cold-hearted? The way he kept walking gave me the answer. Yes, he was. Would I be able to break through that wall? I tried not to feel that hopelessness I was feeling but it was nearly impossible.

We walked for a few more blocks when I finally built up the courage to ask a question. "Where are we going?"

At first, I thought Dally didn't hear me because he didn't answer me directly after. His head cocked slightly as if he were thoughtful while we strolled. I didn't even consider asking the question again, dismayed by his last threats. "We're going to Dingo's to meet up with some girls."

Girls. I chewed on my nails. The only girl I actually talked to was Cherry Valance and I don't think she even counts because she's a Soc. However, if all girls were like that, I'd think I'd like that but I knew that wasn't true. I've grown in the last few weeks. I started to gain some of the weight I have lost and my build was starting to show again. Don't ask me how but I have also been getting taller in the short of period of time. I didn't think I was attractive as Soda or anything but no one was ever as attractive as him.

We were almost to Dingo's as were walking in between stores. I saw the sunset. I paused. The red, the mist, the gold… stay gold. Stay innocent. It was impossible. No one could, only if you die young. I preferred not to.

Dally started pulling me by the ear to follow him. Dally had a hard, firm grasp. I figured I would try not to bother him for the rest of the night, that much.

We entered Dingo's. It wasn't a full bar but the inside sure as hell looked like one. There were multiple fights going on, a few were cheering them on and others, who were already used to the fights were flirting with the girls and taking shots. There was a mess everywhere. No wonder Darry didn't let me go here. I wouldn't be surprised if someone stabbed me on the spots.

I followed Dallas in and took a deep breath as we went forward to meet girls.

Golly, I need a cigarette.


End file.
